I’m Not Who I Was – I’m Stronger Now
Myfanwy Harris on Reinvention, Resilience, and Raregen’s Starlight Wig
I was referred to the hospital in the summer of 2023 as I was worried about a hard lump that had developed at the front of my right breast. It was scanned both with a mammogram and an ultrasound and I was told it was just necrotic fat that 'will probably never go away'. A year later I was back at the hospital for a second mammogram and ultrasound after finding lumps in my armpit. I was given an immediate biopsy on both the armpit lumps and the previous breast lump. During the two week waiting period for my biopsy results, my mammogram results had come back all clear for a second time... but when I was called in to the hospital they confirmed my biopsy results showed I had aggressive Stage 3, Grade 3 breast cancer. This was September 2024.
The next 9 months passed in a blur. I had a lumpectomy and surgery to remove all my lymph nodes in my right armpit. Soon after that the results came back from the breast tissue margins around the tumour removed to say that the cancer had spread wider than they thought, so a few weeks later I had a second operation to remove the breast completely, and I opted for an immediate reconstruction. After a following 4 months of intensive scheduled chemotherapy, losing my hair, catching covid from the hospital during my second infusion, daily blood thinner injections in my tummy (I developed a blood clot around the PICC line in my arm), 15 daily sessions of radiotherapy over 3 weeks, and monthly injections to induce early menopause, brings me to where I am now.
I have just started 2 years of targeted therapy, 3-5 years of bone infusions, and 10 years of hormone therapy to give me the best chance to prevent the cancer returning. Writing it all down here makes it sound so depressing - but what I'm feeling right now is gratitude.
Last month I lost a friend I had made during this whirlwind journey - she was young, beautiful, supportive, and positive to the very end. She inspired me to embrace the light, and embrace today, because tomorrow is not promised. She was also the most stylish girl I'd ever met and dived headfirst into researching how to retain not just our appearance, but our confidence - our strength through our endless hospital visits and constant life adjustments - the most obvious to the world being losing our hair. It was her who sent me the link to Raregen on Instagram.
Throughout chemotherapy I suffered from tissue swelling as a side effect to the steroids. It was probably the toughest thing to get through for me as it was painful. I could not wear wigs at all as my scalp would swell and anything I put on my head would dig in - sending shooting pains throughout my head. I contacted Raergen to ask for advice as I was desperate to find a wig that was comfortable enough to wear for meetings - as I continued to work throughout my treatment as I have my own company and had chosen to hide my diagnosis from my industry as I was worried we would lose work if clients thought I couldn't handle it. I needed to not look sick.
The lovely Rachel at Raregen was so helpful - she suggested their Purehand collection as it had a medical cap which was designed for my very predicament. She also suggested which shade would suit me after I sent her photos to ask her advice. So when I applied for the Starlight programme and was sent the very wig she had recommended - I was over the moon.
Prior to losing my hair I was always Auburn, so platinum ash blonde was a real trust-fall exercise but Astrid arrived and I cannot begin to describe the quality. The hair is absolute silk - I can run my fingers through the scalp and it doesn't snag once. It's light and breathable and I'm in awe. The medical cap is a game-changer. Hands down the most comfortable cap I've tried. The silicone grips your scalp securely but gently and I am convinced that if I'd had this wig during chemotherapy I'd have been spared the pressure pain I had to endure for 4 months. I would 100% recommend this medical cap to anyone undergoing treatment. Wearing Astrid isn't like finding myself again which I thought was my goal, I'm not who I was a year ago... it feels like I am reinventing myself - bolder, stronger, Astrid feels right.
Although my story is still ongoing - my message to anyone reading is to trust your gut. You know your body. If you don't feel like something is quite right - ask for a second opinion. The breast cancer I had turns out to be a rare type that doesn't show up in scans. I didn't feel ill, but I knew this lump was 'different'. And to echo my dear friend who's gained her angel wings - enjoy life! Eat the cake, go on holiday, wear your best dress, go on spa days, and embrace change. We are all remarkable, and there are so many scary things you have to face during treatment... but when they're actualised - and you get through it - which believe me you will - you realise how strong you actually are. Us women are resilient creatures - sometimes life throws you curveballs to remind you. Make it count - in whatever hairstyle you fancy. xxx
